If you have a question about trans people or trans life that you have never felt able to ask out loud, this box is for you. No name. No email. No judgment.
Type your question and send it. We don't ask who you are, and we don't store your name, email, or anything else about you with your question.
A real person at the Network reads every question. Not a bot, not an auto-reply. We assume good faith, even when the wording is clumsy.
Clear, kind answers to common questions get added to this page. We may tidy spelling and remove any identifying details first.
This list grows as questions come in. Answers are written by people at the Network and reviewed before they are posted.
A trans person is someone whose gender is different from what everyone assumed when they were born. A trans woman is a woman. A trans man is a man. Some people are nonbinary, meaning not exactly either. The word works like "tall" or "left-handed": it describes one thing about a person, not everything about them.
For the fuller picture, our guide Understanding your trans neighbors covers the basics in plain language.
The name they use now. That is the whole rule, and it is the same one you already follow when Robert tells you he goes by Bob. The old name is retired: don't use it, and don't ask about it.
If you slip, fix it quickly and keep the conversation moving. A fast correction beats a long apology, because a long apology makes the moment about you.
The words are newer than the people. Trans people show up throughout recorded history, in cultures all over the world. What is new is that more people can finally be open about it, so you hear about it more. Hearing about something more is not the same as it being new.
The simple truth works fine: some people are boys, some are girls, some are both or neither, and sometimes it takes a person a while to figure out which they are. Kids tend to take this in stride, especially when the adults around them stay calm. The kindness rules your kids already know still apply.
Great question, because the line is simpler than people fear. Fine to ask: their name, how their week is going, anything you would ask any neighbor. Not fine: medical questions, or questions about their old name or old photos. Their medical life is private, the way yours is.
When unsure, run it through one filter: "Would I ask anyone else this?" If not, skip it. And if there is something you are genuinely curious about, that is what this page's question box is for.
Our plain-language guide covers the basics, everyday etiquette, honest answers to honest questions, and a short glossary. Written for neighbors, families, and friends. No jargon, no test at the end.
These are free, confidential, and staffed by people who get it.