Everyone's journey to self-actualization is unique. During October and for National Coming Out Day, The South Coast LGBTQ+ Network publishes new stories from courageous individuals in the South Coast that we hope will inspire others to take the important step of revealing who they truly are. With our "Out of the Shadows" campaign we want to convey the message that, although coming out can be a difficult experience for some, it can pave the way for a happy and fulfilled life of authenticity.
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this is mijaAs people everywhere celebrate their coming-out journeys in October, we are shining a light on the parents and guardians of LGBTQ+ family members. For many of them, the decision to openly share that their kid is LGBTQ+ can be difficult due to fear of judgment, stigma, and their circle’s pre-conceived beliefs. Hearing how people made the often life-changing decision to share their experiences will hopefully inspire others to many people in our community to come "out of the shadows," too. This is Mija's story.
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THIS IS SEAN (PART 1)In part one of our conversation with Sean (he/she/they), who is an active member of the nonbinary community from Fall River, Mass., he recalls grappling with gender identity from an early age in a household where being different was met with condemnation. "My father was the first person who called me a faggot," Sean remembers with sadness. But his mother became very supportive, and when he came out as nonbinary in high school to his friends, he was warmly embraced. The one downside to being out and proud? "Everyone thinks I need to be a walking LGBT Wikipedia," he jokes.
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THIS IS SEAN (Part 2)Sean (he/she/they) discusses the challenges he faced early on in his journey as he struggled to understand how he fit into a world defined by male and female stereotypes. Being nonbinary to Sean meant he didn't have to be ashamed of the fact that he was "too much of a girl to be a boy, and too much of a boy to be a girl," he says. "I'm a Sean." Gender fluidity may be becoming more "normal" these days, especially for the younger generation, but Sean hopes the newer members of the LGBTQ+ community don't forget our history and the struggle that went into making LGBTQ+ acceptance possible today.
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THIS IS MARLYNLike many LGBTQ+ people fearful of being ridiculed or rejected, Marlyn (he/him) waited until he was an adult to come out. By then, he had fathered a son with a high school girlfriend. Marlyn felt an initial "blanket of sadness" over the possibility that coming out might adversely affect his ability to be with his child but, with patience and persistence, everything worked out. Being in control of his own story is important to Marlyn. "My sexuality doesn't define who I am; it's a part of me," he says. "If people aren't comfortable with it, it's their problem, not mine."
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THIS IS BRIANBrian (he/him) wants people to know that life really does get better after you come out - or, as he thinks of it, after you begin "living in your truth." His coming-out journey was difficult in the beginning. Mom told him that being gay was "the devil inside" of him, and forced him into counseling to try to "fix" him. But with time came understanding and acceptance, and Brian credits finding supportive people with the happiness and fulfillment he feels today.
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THIS IS ANTONIO"It is light, it is love, it is everything you've been denying yourself for a long time." South Coast resident Antonio (he/him) talks about his coming-out history - from his initial encounters overseas, to his revelation to his sisters and ailing father, to the negative experiences in the workplace he had to overcome, Antonio covers the full spectrum of emotions in his journey to happiness and self-acceptance. While he believes that coming out provides incredible life-affirming benefits, Antonio acknowledge that, for some, coming out is not always a safe choice. For those individuals, Antonio's advice is to stay proud and "stay strong."
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THIS IS JOANIESouth Coast native Joanie (she/her) tells us how she came out in her 30's but wishes she hadn't let the fear of being ostracized prevent her from coming out sooner. "It was just a huge weight off my shoulders," she recalls. "And the best advice I can give is to 'rip the Band-Aid off' and approach the person you're most afraid of telling your story to." Thankfully, her family and co-workers have all responded positively. Joanie is at the age now where she is thinking about what her future holds, and she hopes people will be as kind and supportive to her as she grows older as they have been during a journey which began years ago.
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The South Coast LGBTQ+ Network
A 501(c)(3) Nonprofit Organization P.O. Box 8473 New Bedford, MA 02740 (774) 775-2656 |